Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game!

We have had a lot of friends ask how things have been going lately so here is a little update. We are hanging in there with all the trials that have come our way what more can anyone ask. With April 1st coming tomorrow my thoughts have been circling on why anyone would think it is funny to announce they are pregnant when they aren't and after a lot of thought it hit me, they really just don't get it! For them it is a funny joke but for others it is so painful. I have cried through many pregnancy announcements not because I don't love my friends and family but because my heart is shattered that it isn't me.. For the last 2.5 years I have cried through announcement after announcement and felt the pain as my heart longs for what I want so badly... I know that those who falsely announce they are expecting haven't felt the pain of infertility or the pain of loosing a child... But I know they have felt pain in a way that maybe I haven't.... So those who might think it is a simple funny joke please think of the pain that you have felt in your life and think twice before you post something that may make someone break (and not just with pregnancy false relationships can hurt those longing for a partner as well as other things out there)... We are still working with our fertility specialist and it is a long and slow process we don't have many answers so we just keep trying and in the mean time keep our heads up. I have been terrified as we continue, I am scared of the unknown because I don't think my heart can take loosing another baby it can barely take the disappointment each month we aren't pregnant... But I know if I don't try because I am too scared then I will never have what I desire most. We face things in life that are scary sometimes they scare us enough we put our heads in the sand and pray it will all go away. The biggest reason for this is we are afraid of failing. I know in my life I have settled and not done things I would have loved to because I was worried I would not succeed... I love the quote from a Cinderella story "you can't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game" I haven't always lived by that but I defiantly am trying because I know deep down faith and fear cannot dwell in the same place. I know that if I have faith this will all work out the way it supposed to, but if I have fear I will not feel any comfort during the process.... I am still working on focusing on myself and hoping that I can find the faith I need to keep enduring to the end!